G’day Mites. Oim in bloody Orstralia. West bloody Orstralia. Its very flat. I drove from Perth to Albany. Almost dead straight road. Almost flat, just a few lumpy bits; single carriageway, but no worries as I didn’t see more than a dozen other cars and a few large lorries. I think I passed three towns, four petrol stations and I saw one police car in the 450k I travelled after I left Perth. I was a bit worried about running out of petrol and being attacked by wild dingos, but I didn’t see any of them either, just 3 or 4 dead kangaroos lying like large rabbits by the road side, and lots of green parrots.
I saw quite a few different sorts of parrot, had a baby kangaroo put his paws on my knee and got to prod a koala. I am not actually sure it was alive, or even real because it didn’t move at all. Apparently their diet of gum tree leaves is very low in most of the things you need to keep you spritely, so they don’t do a lot of moving. You’d think they would have found something else to eat by now . Kangaroos have got it cracked, they bound around like, well kangaroos .
I also met a Tazmanian devil , who sounded just like the cartoon character. I had better confess that these things didn’t happen in the wild. I went to a little game park. I did see wild roos tho, and a fox, but otherwise West Oz was pretty free of wild things. In fact it is probably the most orderly place I have ever been to. Everyone obeys speed limits and drives nicely. They occasionally have outbreaks of young men doing wheelies. They call them ‘hoons’, catch them and then publicly give them a severe ticking off which has them in tears.
There is no litter anywhere, I even saw a road sweeping wagon tidying up a beach. I didn’t see any cats, any beggars and very few dogs. Dogs are banned most places. They are allowed on some beaches in winter, and I was surprised to see owners carrying clubs - I assumed to beat the dogs into submission. The clubs turned out to be long handled poop scoopers, there is a big fine, possibly a flogging, if you let your dog crap anywhere.
Everyone really is friendly. I got the wrong ticket on a train. On the machine It said ‘concessions after 9.30’ it was 10.30 so I pressed that button. The ticket inspector explained slowly that I had to be a student or senior to qualify and have a concession card. He wouldn’t take the extra though, ‘no worries love’. Everyone is sports mad. The gyms are full of people - from sweating 20 somethings, to glowing geriatrics. The Olympics were shown on big screens in the towns and medallists are national heroes. Just opposite the house I stayed in Freemantle, was a large hard court area area where the whole day, every Saturday, about 40 teams played sports and crowds watched. The teams were all girls and the game was netball. The girls Olympic team wins as many medals as the boys. Overall from a population of 20m Australia came 6th in the medal table, just behind the UK with 20m population. Incidentally did anyone notice how the Saudi womens team got on. I didn’t notice them in the pole vault.
Freemantle and Perth were fun and I loved just mooching around there but I was obsessed with seeing a whale so hence the trip to Albany on the southern ocean to go whale watching. It turned out to be empty ocean watching. It is winter still, but I had great weather all the time in OZ apart from the 3 days in Albany. It was wet and windy first day and the little buggers wouldn’t come out, so as cap'n ''g'day oim Jason' said " you kin come agin tomorrer if you dont see a while terday" i didn't see any, just a few seals and some dolphin fins . They didn’t like the rain either and didn’t hang around for long , so I ‘ kime agin’. The weather was nicer, the sea was a bit rough, and we excitedly chased after reported whales but they always ducked out of sight. We didn’t have loud music playing on the boat all the time but the absence of whales may have been because we had a party of japanese tourists on board. The whales needn’t have worried the poor japs were huddled inside the boat looking sick and miserable – the whales revenge !
I was sorry not to see a whale but the southern coast is stunning, the seas are great and I took lots of pics of seals and Albert Rosses. The cottage I stayed at did have wild roos in the garden, and they produce great wine (not the roos).
I am off to New Zealand now a place where men are men and sheep have feelings too.
